Why is it that sometimes we find it hard to forgive others? There are certain reasons for this. Here are some of them, which I took from the book, “Forgiving What You Can’t Forget.”
- I’m afraid the hurtful actions will happen again.
- Clinging to resentment gives me a semblance of control in a situation that seems deeply unjust.
- The pain I endured has changed my life, yet it feels like nobody has acknowledged the wrongness of what I went through.
- Forgiveness seems to downplay or even negate the seriousness of what occurred.
- It’s hard to forgive when I still harbor intense hostility towards the person who hurt me.
- I don’t feel prepared to forgive.
- The wounds are still fresh, and I’m still hurting.
- They haven’t shown any remorse or recognized the harm they caused.
- Reconnecting with this person isn’t feasible or safe, and it’s not even reasonable for me to engage in a conversation with them.
- I’m still entangled in a challenging situation with no resolution in sight.
- Forgiving feels like it might give them false hope that I want to rebuild the relationship when I don’t.
- It’s simpler to avoid this person altogether than to establish boundaries to prevent further harm.
- What they did feels irreversible, so forgiveness seems pointless.
- The person who hurt me is no longer around, and I can’t forgive someone I can’t communicate with.
- I don’t foresee any positive outcomes from forgiveness at this moment.
I want you to go through this list. Which of them resonates with you? Can you relate to any of these reasons? Were you also in a situation when you find it hard to say, “I forgive you?”
As human beings, it is completely normal to feel this way. In fact, the more we rationalize why we should not forgive someone, the more we find it hard to forgive.
However, as followers of Jesus (Yahshua), we are called to a higher standard. We are not called to simply do what feels natural or what seems to be easy. We are called to follow in the footsteps of our Savior. That’s the reason we are called, “CHRIST-ians.”
When Christ was hanging on the torture stake, when He was filled with pain, anguish, and discomfort, in the midst of His suffering, He still had the compassion and love to utter these words:
“Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do” (Luke 23:34).
This verse from Luke 23:34, where Jesus asks for forgiveness for those who crucified him, speaks volumes about the essence of forgiveness. It’s like witnessing a powerful moment of humanity in the midst of unimaginable pain and suffering.
What Jesus does here is truly remarkable. Despite enduring excruciating agony and injustice, he chooses to extend forgiveness to his tormentors. It’s a profound display of love and mercy, showing us that forgiveness knows no bounds.
From this verse, we can learn that forgiveness is not about waiting for an apology or acknowledgment of wrongdoing. It’s about a deep-seated compassion that transcends the hurt and betrayal we may feel. Jesus understands that those who harmed him were acting out of ignorance or misunderstanding, and he forgives them anyway.
In essence, this verse teaches us that forgiveness is a choice grounded in empathy and love, even when it seems unfathomable. It reminds us of the power of compassion to heal wounds and restore relationships, no matter how dire the circumstances may seem.
So, if you find it difficult to forgive, look to the sacrifice and suffering of our Savior. Learn from His example and from there, I pray that you find the strength to forgive and surrender all the hurt, bitterness, and anxiety to the feet of our God.
Forgiving others involve faith — faith that when you forgive, God will help you in the healing process. However, how do you increase your faith? In our course, “Heroes of Faith,” you’ll learn how to increase your faith and stand on the promises of God. In this course, discover the powerful lessons from Abel to Samuel, from the biblical characters mentioned in the Faith Chapter. Click HERE and discover how you can dramatically strengthen your faith!
